“Compassion hurts. When you feel connected to everything, you also feel responsible for everything. And you cannot turn away. Your destiny is bound with the destinies of others. You must either learn to carry the Universe or be crushed by it. You must grow strong enough to love the world, yet empty enough to sit down at the same table with its worst horrors.”
― Andrew Boyd, The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe
Last week I cried when I watched a news video about evictions in Houston, so far away from where I live, yet it felt so close. I don’t know the people, I don’t know the city, but the story about the young man, who got evicted with his wife and his baby left me in tears.
I told my husband about it, still emotionally in turmoil hours later, still not understanding what is going on; unable to help or to do anything I needed to share and as always he listened.
“Well, find out where they are and if they have the money for a bus ticket they can live with us,” he said and I felt better.
Yes, that’s what I will do, I thought, but of course I didn’t do anything. Writing to CNN would have been a start. I was actually angry with them and any other news outlet out there. How dare you record people in distress, showing me their despair and then walk away and don’t do anything about it. They all should have funds available to instantly help right then and there. Don’t they make enough money?
The old lady, sitting on her chair outside the apartment where she lived for years. The young man with his family, not having a car, being forced onto the streets where nobody is willing to help. Transporting their belonging in the kid’s buggy. It was all too much.
Am I the only one who hurts when she sees ‘stuff’ like that?
https://www.cnn.com/2020/09/07/us/israel-rodriguez-eviction-gofundme-trnd/index.html
Yesterday, only three days later, my husband who is always trying to share new news with me -unsuccessfully I might add because I don’t want to hear what his phone has to say- showed me the headline.
The man who got evicted in Houston has gotten help. People from all over this country had felt exactly the same emotional turmoil. One of them started a ‘GoFundMe’ for the young man and his family, another one started one with the goal to help people who face eviction. All of them got more donation then they asked for. Even a NFL player in Houston was concerned about the well-being of the old lady and promised to help. All of it felt so good.
The fact is I am normal. What I feel is normal, my inner uproar is normal. I am am not alone, neither am I a fool. There are many just like me who still feel what we all should feel. Compassion toward other human beings, even though we might not know them.
He is right, compassion hurts, perhaps it has to.
I feel better now, until the next time when another avalanche of emotions will roll over me unexpectedly.
Sadly, the situation you wrote about here, way back in August, has only multiplied and deepened in the ensuing months.
As for your personal reaction, I have placated my guilty conscience a bit by telling myself that I will make large posthumous contributions to various do-gooding organizations. Since I am in the process of divorcing, and since my two adult children are generally sympathetic and caring individuals and can make their own way in the world, this desire may in fact become a reality. I don’t think my husband would have gone along with this if he was still in control of the purse strings.
I think it can be overwhelming, the need is so great and so widespread. Almost always, when there’s a human interest story on the news people come forward to help. I young mother has no transportation to get to her job, usually a car dealership or an individual with a spare car will offer it to her. A family with children sleeping on the floor, a furniture store shows up with beds and more.
Yet there are so many other families who don’t get showcased on television whose kids are still sleeping on the floor, or worse, in a car or on the street. There should be some existing nonprofit in our own towns that work to fix these things locally, so that we can make a difference right where we live.
The question for me is, what organization can I trust is truly making a difference?
Perhaps the laws need to be fixed and then all the organizations won’t be needed anymore. Maybe we all need a hefty dose of ‘fixin’ to care more and get more involved. I don’t have the answers, just a sh**load of questions. 🙂
I am on the same page, Bridget, and always feel that the little I do is absurd. There are times when I am falling asleep in my comfy bed and remember that so many people have no bed, possible no home and probably an empty stomach too or they are cowering somewhere in fear or pain. I am aware that my angst helps no one, so I try hard to direct my thoughts and energies into more practical and effective channels. I think, though, that we must keep hurting in order to push ourselves to make change happen.
I have the same thoughts. I mentioned it a few times before. Once upon a time we were house less. It came out of the blue and perhaps that is one of the reasons why I feel now so deeply, or perhaps I always have been that way. I too fear I am not doing enough and don’t like it either.
Thank you for being such a compassionate soul. I feel the hurt as well when coming upon stories such as the one you describe. I don’t like seeing people in pain or without food and shelter or being oppressed. It hurts the heart and I think it’s because we can’t always help financially or make it right. I’m glad the young man and his family found help. It’s as it should be if we all do our part when the opportunity arises.
Then you and me are alike. You hurt the same way and that’s why you understand and took your time to leave me a comment. Thank you for that!
Of course, we never will. meanwhile you and I, and countless others, will rant, and cry, and curse. We will do whatever we can to help. Blessings to you Bridget, and to those you do care, and do help.
Caring is a curse.
While all of the gofundme and similar collections are really marvellous they are not a long term solution. Just down the road, in the next town, the next city, or another country, there are lots more people in desperate need of help, of a home, of food and clothing. As a world society we could, if everyone agreed, sort out ALL of the global poverty. There are enough resources and funds to ensure that everyone has a comfortable, worthwhile life. If only we all agreed!
You are right. The ‘Gofundme’ is just a temporary fix while the problem is long therm. Only laws and regulations could help the situation, unfortunately the current administration is not very interested in preventing poverty.
I am not sure what will happen, but I hope one day we all, globally, will understand that we all sit in the same boat.