Wrong as wrong can be

I do everything full heartedly, always give my best, even when I am wrong, even then will I do everything I can to outdo myself. And I am telling you, I do have my moments. I wish I could blame it on age or missing hormones, I wish I could blame it on somebody else -anybody else- but often there is just no way out. 

I went to a different grocery store on Friday, one that I don’t often go to. I had seen a flyer, showing many things on sale that I just cannot live without -like two pineapples, a smaller wok and three pounds of kale. That was worth going out of my way -in more than one way.

I studied the flyer, went from aisle to aisle -made sure I didn’t overlook anything. Buy-one-get-one-free, these are magical words. It doesn’t matter if I need it or not. In case I needed I have two, if not -let’s not talk about it.

On my way out I remembered that I needed a money order. We have given up on checks, pay everything online these days, just our newspaper lady, she insists on non-plastic payments. I looked around in search for the customer service desk. Sure enough, it was on the other side of the store, right at the exit that was the furthest away from my car.

I lined up behind a couple who bought a money order as well (we must have the same newspaper lady), and I patiently waited my turn. A woman walked up, passed by me and the couple and lined up on the other side.

“She has some nerve,” I thought to myself, “Cutting the line like this, who does she think she is?” The couple decided to play the lottery as well, they needed some other things and they took their time. Another customer showed up and lined up behind the woman on the wrong side of the waiting line as well.

“You have to be kidding me,” I thought but didn’t say anything, went instead over my receipt again and silently applauded myself for all the good deals I had found.

Finally, the couple was done and walked away. I had to move out of the way so that they could pass by (they should fix that). I walked up to the clerk and so did the woman who had waited on the other side.

I looked at her, and she looked at me and then I saw all the people behind her and it hit me. It was like in the joke about wrong-way driving. “What do you mean one car is driving in the wrong direction, there are hundreds of them.”

I shook my head and laughed out loud. I shared my stupidity and the joke with the customers who had waited on the right side of the line. I couldn’t help buy laugh, couldn’t believe how absentminded I had been.

“Good grief, I was ready to fight with each and every one of you,” I admitted, and they laughed with me, insisted that I should buy my money order as I was already there. We joked around a while and then I left…shaking my head at myself.

“Happy Easter,” one said, “Oh dear, I won’t find the eggs,” I  replied and we laughed again.