“Happy New Year” – Not Again!

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Happy New Year! How many of these messages did you have on your phone this morning? A whole year full of joy, actually that’s a wonderful wish. Especially when it’s cheered full of emotion at midnight. Then, when we are overwhelmed and maybe a little drunk, when we might burn our hands on the sparklers and are frightened by the bang of firecrackers.

Then we also mean that we wish others only the best.

Only the best! What does it actually mean? We often say and write this in these first days of a new year, but of course, no one can have the best of everything. And if it did, it would be terribly boring. Life consists of a mixture of things that go well, those that splash along fine, and also setbacks and disappointments. But, as everyone knows, they are important for further development. That’s why I wouldn’t want to miss out on the dark moments, even if a fairy godmother offered me to be happy all the time from now on.

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Oh yes, the New Year.

How did you spend New Year’s Eve? My husband and I stayed at home together, cooked, watched Netflix, and watched at some point “Dinner for One” on YouTube because it’s a European tradition and my soul longs for the old oh-so-familiar routine. At midnight we had a small glass of ‘Bubbly’ and hoped for a decent and short fireworks display for our dogs -which was not granted.

Besides the fireworks, it was a wonderful, quiet, almost normal evening. Just as I have secretly wished for New Year’s Eve for a long time. When we were younger, we always organized a small party shortly before and invited friends and neighbors to our place, simply because … yes, because New Year’s Eve should be celebrated. But when we got older, it changed and it’s just what we need and it’s lovely. Also, it was fitting for this year, which swept us away with its constantly new developments. A year we could have not envisioned.

However, around midnight I was so overwhelmed that tears came to my eyes. This duet of old, new, and the missing in-between makes me so melancholic. Every year I think “I wish there was a between-the-years”‘. Not just this quiet and boring week between Christmas and New Year’s Eve, but an official time without a year, in which it is neither 2022 nor 2023. Like on the old borders in Europe. You drove to the border in Austria, showed your passport, or were waved through, then you drove about three minutes in the land between two countries (the no-man’s-land) before you reached the Italian border house, where you showed your passport again, or were waived through.

Imagine, a week without a year?

Why? In order not to simply be dragged on to the next chapter, but to reflect on the core, in order to cleanse oneself of all the old thoughts and experiences. To get ready for something new to begin. Maybe to fast or pray, or not, just a time you don’t waste with entertainment, but use for yourself.

For people who tend to ‘think things through’ (the overthinkers like me), New Year’s Eve is often a kind of borderline experience a regular yearly walk through a philosophical deep valley.

That’s why New Year’s Eve is the ultimate holiday of life balance for me.

What have I achieved and experienced in the past year? Did I make an effort? And what will the new year bring? I have an amazing husband and wonderful friends who shower me with love, criticism, attention, and gifts, which I don’t always deserve. Big feelings, fundamental respect, the step into a new chapter in life. It’s no wonder that the end of the year is always emotionally exhausting for me.

The rush at midnight between the years, it feels a bit like walking into the future backwards. Like I am still whispering goodbye and waving, but then turn around and kiss Hello.

When people break up or get divorced, we advise them to stay alone for a while. “Don’t jump into the next relationship right away, get over the old one first before you even think about a new one.” And it makes sense.

So, where is my time to get over the old year? The new year is already here and was greeted short and sweet, then we went to bed.

And the day after? I will wake up today in the morning long after this post has been published, and I will be feeling hungover because I’ve shot enough endorphins for a whole month in 24 hours.

But then the relief of having arrived in the new –and having another year ahead of me– always prevails. Looking forward now. Hoping, wishing, believing it will be better.

Only the best for all of us!

May the New Year ask us inspiring questions and perhaps give a few more answers than last year. May the worst happen only in our minds and may reality surprise us in a good way.

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Because you can’t be happy if you are not healthy!