…
As if all muscles were immersed in acid. Like the moment when you step into the void on a staircase in the dark, like a fall into the depths, only inside. Like tiredness that soaks the air. Like “Run!”, but you don’t know where to go, there’s nothing you could or want to run to, and besides, you’re too weak for that. Like a deep moan between the hectic breaths, like a need to sit down now that doesn’t stop, even if you’ve been sitting down for a long time.
“Disappointment
Can do a couple things.
It can drop you into a giant
sucking sinkhole of
depression,
I remember Paul so well. He was such a fun guy, a goofball, who made others laugh. He was a kind soul, but had some temper problems, especially after the loss of a tight tennis match. We were in the same tennis club. I danced at his wedding, celebrated his daughter’s birth with him, just like all his other friends.
The last miles are always the hardest. That’s when we feel tired, our feet hurt and every muscle and every bone in our body aches and seems to scream STOP, but the race is not over, and we continue to run on autopilot. We pursue the race without thinking and at the end, right after the finish line, we sit or lay down and feel empty.
Good Morning my Worries
You are back so I see
I hope you are well rested
and ready for battle
because today I will fight you
and will kick your behind
.
There was a time in my life, when I thought about the past a lot. I sat there for hours, days and weeks, trying to find the answers to all the questions that I had. I wanted answers and explanations about many things that had happened in my life, but most of all about my parents. I was convinced that many things would be different, if my past would have been different.